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Government Promises System Will Work Better This Time For Real

This is satire. Characters and scenarios are fictional. Any resemblance to real persons, statements, or events is used for commentary and entertainment purposes.

ACCRA — In an address to the nation Tuesday, officials confirmed that the latest revision of the electronic payment platform would, unlike the previous four iterations, function as advertised, a claim they described as ’this time, seriously.'

The situation continues to develop.