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Man Says He Not Hungry, Eats Half Your Food

This is satire. Characters and scenarios are fictional. Any resemblance to real persons, statements, or events is used for commentary and entertainment purposes.

LAVINGTON — Declining a lunch invitation Saturday with the assertion that he was ’not hungry at all,’ 35-year-old Victor Muthomi subsequently consumed approximately 47% of his host’s plate over the course of casual conversation.

The situation continues to develop.